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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28354311">It's Beginning to Look a Lot like Christmas</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/reading_writing_dreaming/pseuds/reading_writing_dreaming'>reading_writing_dreaming</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>ATEEZ (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Christmas, Christmas Party, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Enemies to Lovers, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Homophobia, Just Pretend It Makes Sense, M/M, Office AU, but i have no idea how anything works at those so it's nonsense, hwa's parents are dicks but they're not really in the story, i worked hard on it, only a little, pls just read this, some sad backstories but they aren't the focus, they work at a publishing office</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 21:21:28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>17,526</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28354311</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/reading_writing_dreaming/pseuds/reading_writing_dreaming</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Hongjoong sighed as he looked at the email sent to him from his boss. There was one other recipient of the email. A name that brought fear to Hongjoong’s poor heart. <em>Park Seonghwa</em>. His tormentor. His nightmare. The email read: “Hello, I hope this message finds you well. As you know, each year we choose two random employees to plan the Holiday party. You two are our lucky picks this year! You can take a few hours every day over the next few weeks to work on the party so get to planning! Best, Jeong Yunho.” </p><p>For the sake of his friends, he would try to make this work. For the sake of <em>Christmas</em>, he would make this work. He could do this. He just had to be kind and understanding. He could do this, he repeated the thought in his head over again. He took a sip from his cooling hot chocolate and he was probably imagining it but he thought he could hear the faint sound of Yunho’s laughter travelling down the hall.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Choi Jongho/Kang Yeosang, Choi San/Jung Wooyoung, Jeong Yunho/Song Mingi, Kim Hongjoong/Park Seonghwa</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>159</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>It's Beginning to Look a Lot like Christmas</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Okay, so, this fic is a product of my love of enemies to lovers and also kind of like a gift for my irl bestie laura :') ily bb</p><p>I hope you enjoy this!!! Listen to Christmas music to set the scene more if you want because that's all I listened to while writing it!!</p><p>also I barely edited this so if something is amiss, look the other way pls and thx :)</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>***</p><p>Hongjoong sighed as he looked at the email sent to him from his boss. There was one other recipient of the email. A name that brought fear to Hongjoong’s poor heart. <em>Park Seonghwa</em>. His tormentor. His nightmare. The email read: “Hello, I hope this message finds you well. As you know, each year we choose two random employees to plan the Holiday party. You two are our lucky picks this year! You can take a few hours every day over the next few weeks to work on the party so get to planning! Best, Jeong Yunho.” </p><p>Hongjoong closed the email a little more forcefully than he needed to. Just what he needed on top of everything else going on. He had just been given a new manuscript to edit on top of the others that were piling up on his desk. He slowly slid out of his chair and glanced over the cubicle wall to see if Seonghwa had seen the email yet. He was met with a pair of warm brown eyes already staring in his direction. Staring might not have been the right word, it was more like an intense glare. Hongjoong jumped back, blushed and grinned sheepishly, sitting down again. He faced his computer again and groaned. He heard Seonghwa scoff on the other side of the flimsy, grey wall. This was going to be torture. He glanced forlornly at his giant pile of work. He loved the holidays and it has been his <em>dream</em> to plan this party. Why, he asked the universe, did it have to be with the person in this office he dreaded the most. It’s not even that he disliked Seonghwa, quite the opposite actually. </p><p>Ever since the man model walked down the entrance hallway of their office as if it was a runway all those years ago, Hongjoong was obsessed. He could barely form a sentence around the other man and couldn’t help but stare at his tall frame with awe. But, if Hongjoong was being honest with himself, it wasn’t any of that that sold him on Park Seonghwa, it was the way he carried himself when he worked. The way he would stay late if he knew a client was in a different time zone. The way he would fight with people just so his clients would remain happy. It was the way Hongjoong would catch Seonghwa crying over books he read, the way he would get this fire in his eyes when he was excited about something. It was his passion for his job, his friends, his life. Seonghwa was a bright, burning star and Hongjoong was caught in his orbit. Always swirling around him in chaotic admiration but never close enough to make impact. And Seonghwa hated him. Hongjoong slammed his head on his desk and sighed. </p><p>Hongjoong opened a new email and began to write a proposed meeting time and place. With a click, he sent it and started flipping through one of the many manuscripts on his desk.</p><p>“Are you serious?” he heard Seonghwa mutter. Not a minute later the bright blond-haired man popped up over the wall separating the two of them. “Did you just send me an email even though we’re right next to each other?” He asked incredulously. “You’re insufferable.” He said. Hongjoong smiled sheepishly and shrugged. As if he would just get up and talk to the man who greeted him with a glare colder than the frappucino’s Hongjoong drank everyday. </p><p>“That’s fine. We can go out for lunch and start planning. That is, if you can handle this on top of all your work you still have.” He said, eyeing the stack of manuscripts on Hongjoong’s desk. Hongjoong’s blood boiled as he watched the older man smirk, who was he to judge how much work he had left? He always was pushing the shorter man’s buttons. Seonghwa sat down again and Hongjoong heard him typing rather loudly on his keyboard. Rolling his eyes, Hongjoong sent a silent curse at Yunho who probably did this on purpose, knowing Seonghwa hated him. He also, Hongjoong realized horrified, knew about the intense crush that he’s had on Seonghwa for the last few years. He shot out of his seat startling those around him. He turned and almost sprinted towards his bosses office. He had barely knocked before he stormed in the beautiful corner office. </p><p>“Can I help you, Hongjoong?” He asked. </p><p>“How about you tell me why you paired me up and the man I’m basically in love with to plan the office party when you know he hates me?” Hongjoong spat sarcastically. Yunho sighed and looked up at him from his desk chair.</p><p>“Listen, I know it’s your dream to plan this party and I know that you and Seonghwa need to learn to work together.” Yunho explained. Hongjoong opened his mouth to retort but shut it at the seriousness of Yunho’s glare in his direction, “I know you can’t see it but you’re little rivalry or whatever is affecting the whole office. Most of us are friends with both of you but we can’t do anything outside of work because we’re afraid if we invite you two lunatics, it’ll start world war three!” He finished. Hongjoong felt all the anger drain from his body and his shoulders slumped. He didn’t realize how badly this was affecting those he cared about. </p><p>“Okay, fine. I get it. I’ll try my best to work with him to plan this party but that doesn’t mean we’re going to be best friends or anything.” He said. Yunho rolled his eyes.</p><p>“Whatever, get out of my office I have work.” He finished, laughing. Hongjoong huffed and walked back to his desk. Where he slumped dramatically in his chair and glanced forlornly at the pile of manuscripts surrounding him like a jail cell. </p><p>He shook his head and forced himself to focus on his work for the few hours of sanity he had left before his dreaded lunch with Seonghwa. For the sake of his friends, he would try to make this work. For the sake of <em>Christmas</em>, he would make this work. He could do this. He just had to be kind and understanding. He could do this, he repeated the thought in his head over again. He took a sip from his cooling hot chocolate and he was probably imagining it but he thought he could hear the faint sound of Yunho’s laughter travelling down the hall.</p><p> </p><p>After trying his best to focus on work, Hongjoong came to the conclusion that he needed to take a break. He got up and stretched and headed to the break room to make a cup of tea. As he got closer he could hear the voices of his two friends Wooyoung and San. He rounded the corner into the little kitchen area and their voices abruptly died out. Hongjoong looked at them suspiciously.</p><p>“Hi guys.” He announced. They smiled at him, lifting their coffee mugs in greeting.</p><p>“Hey Hongjoong.” Wooyoung announced. He was always so happy, actually both of them were. They annoyed Hongjoong when they first met, always clinging to each other and gossiping, but their unending smiles, laughs, and positivity won out and they quickly became close friends.</p><p>“Is something bothering you?” San asked. Hongjoong looked up from where he was fussing with his mug of tea. How could they tell that something was wrong? There was no way they knew about the party already.</p><p>“Why would anything be bothering me?” Hongjoong asked glancing back at them. The happy pair shared a glance.</p><p>“It’s just, you’re steeping your tea kinda violently.” Wooyoung commented, nodding his head towards Hongjoong’s hands. The man in question looked down to see his tea had splashed everywhere. He must have done it without thinking. “Is something the matter? You can talk to us if you need to.” He finished. Hongjoong sighed. He knew he should just talk to someone even just to vent about this predicament he was in but Yunho’s words echoed in his mind. If they were truly friends with Seonghwa too, he didn’t want to put them in an awkward place. They nodded at him encouragingly. Well, he thought, a little complaining never hurt anyone.</p><p>“Well you know how employees are randomly chosen every year to help plan the holiday party?” Hongjoong began. Both men nodded. “Well, I got picked this year.” He explained. Wooyoung frowned in confusion.</p><p>“But you love Christmas! Why is this making you upset? You’ve wanted to plan the party for years!” San exclaimed. Hongjoong nodded.</p><p>“I got picked to plan the party,” he sighed, “...with Seonghwa.” He finished. The room was so quiet you could hear a pin drop. To be honest, Hongjoong didn’t think he ever spent a moment with Wooyoung and San where they weren’t talking. It was jarring. Suddenly, the boys burst out laughing. They could barely breathe, they were cackling so hard.</p><p>“Wow. You have the worst luck. I couldn’t have planned something worse if I tried.” Wooyoung said through his tears of laughter. “This party is going to be a disaster.” He huffed. Hongjoong was offended. He had been begging to plan the holiday party for so long and he was not about to let some snobby co-worker get in his way nor the judgement of his friends. </p><p>“You know what? I’m going to plan the best party that this office has ever seen!” He exclaimed. Wooyoung and San snorted.</p><p>“Sure, if you can stop staring at him and making a fool of yourself in front of him every time you speak.” San commented. Hongjoong huffed and turned back to his tea.</p><p>“I will not let some handsome, tall, perfect, privileged, snobby, rude, boring editor get in my way.” Hongjoong exclaimed. He expected cheers or any sort of reaction from his friends but they were snickering quietly and staring right above Hongjoong’s head. “He’s right behind me isn’t he?” He asked. Wooyoung nodded. Hongjoong spun around to confront Seonghwa but the older man was already turning the corner to go back to his desk. Hongjoong sighed. <em>This is going to be the worst</em>, he thought, sending a silent prayer to the universe that he would make it out of this holiday season alive. </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p>“So do you have any ideas?” Seonghwa asked as he picked at his salad. Hongjoong grinned. As much as he hated working with his sworn enemy/ love of his life, he adored the holiday season. Growing up he would always be the one to help his mom out decorating the house, he would wake up early on Christmas morning and his mom would make him a big cup of hot chocolate, and they would open presents while watching holiday movies. Ever since he moved out, the holidays haven’t felt the same, this year especially. He still decorates and shops for all his friends and family but the magic wasn’t as strong.</p><p>“Well I’ve been thinking about what we should do and every year the people in charge always do the same thing. They get a few small decorations and a tree and call it a day. I think, to be remembered, we should throw the most festive party we’ve ever had. I’m sure I can convince Yunho to give us extra money.” He explained in a rush. He was already writing a list on his sandwich stained napkin. As the silence stretched he looked up to see Seonghwa’s face blank.</p><p>“You just called our boss by his first name.” He said. Hongjoong frowned.</p><p>“Yeah, we’ve been friends since university.” He explained with a shrug. He continued scribbling, oblivious to the shocked face Seonghwa was pulling.</p><p>“I’ve also known him since university. That’s strange.” Seonghwa explained. Hongjoong nodded. It seemed realistic for Yunho to have had more friends than Hongjoong. He had always been a loner until Yunho had come along. He was just charismatic, he made friends with everyone. “Anyway, I like your idea. It would be nice to be noticed and to show how much effort we are willing to put into this company.” He explained. Hongjoong rolled his eyes. Of course, that’s why Perfect Park wanted to do this. He was always kissing up to the higher ups and staying late. He made the rest of the office look bad. Unfortunately, he was also very handsome, and charmed most people, including Hongjoong, despite his one-track work mind.</p><p>“I’m glad you agree. I love the holidays. I can’t wait to decorate everything and to listen to Christmas music!” Hongjoong exclaimed. He knew he was a little too excited about Christmas but he didn’t care, it was a time to celebrate and how could you <em>not</em> be happy when there were pretty lights everywhere and happy holiday music playing everywhere you went. They continued brainstorming ideas (Hongjoong noted that he was doing most of the work) and when their long lunch was done and they were on the way back to the office, they had a list of items to buy and a mission to increase the party budget. </p><p>"Have you looked at the Johnson manuscript yet?” Seonghwa asked as they rode up the elevator to their floor.</p><p>“How do you know about the Johnson manuscript? He’s been under my watch for years.” Hongjoong frowned. With a smirk Seonghwa stepped out of the opening doors of the elevator.</p><p>“<em>Yunho</em> asked me to double check it before you got to read it.” He explained. Hongjoong’s face glowed red with anger and embarrassment.</p><p>“You are such an arrogant prick.” He exclaimed. Seonghwa laughed and made his way to his cubicle. He hated that stupid laugh and how much it affected him. Hongjoong stormed his way to his own desk, set down his left overs, and then furiously made his way to Yunho’s office. If he thought being Hongjoong’s boss was going to make this any less loud, he was sorely mistaken. He could hear Seonghwa’s annoyingly attractive laugh following him the whole way down the hall. </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p>“Can you hurry up? I have a lot of work to do today.” Seonghwa grumbled from behind Hongjoong. It was a few days after they planned their ideas for the party and today they were taking a few hours to go shopping. Of course, Yunho gave them the extra spending money, wanting to make up for Hongjoong being so upset with him, so they were ready to go. Hongjoong was just finishing an email to one of his authors before they left but was taking an annoyingly long time, Seonghwa noted as he hovered over the smaller man’s desk.</p><p>"If you shut up and let me concentrate, I’ll get this done faster.” Hongjoong snapped back. He continued typing, finishing the email and sending it off. Seonghwa watched as he shut off his computer and grabbed his jacket. “Let’s go.” Hongjoong said with a grin. Although he was irrationally irritated by Seonghwa with every fiber of his being it was obvious that he was excited to go to the stores and see all the holiday stuff. Seonghwa rolled his eyes and started speed walking to the elevator not waiting for Hongjoong. “Hey! Slow down!” Hongjoong yelled after him.</p><p>“Maybe if you had longer legs you could keep up.” Seonghwa stated as they got into the elevator. Hongjoong glared at him and then a thought popped into his head.</p><p>“Let’s get coffee before we shop! I want something to keep me warm.” Hongjoong suggested, smiling, already imagining his drink. Seonghwa looked at him incredulously.</p><p>“Whatever, as long as you’re buying.” He replied. Hongjoong grinned like nothing was going to ruin this for him. He was basically vibrating by the time they got to the store. He paused before entering, gazing at the Christmas displays through the window. Seonghwa watched him curiously, wondering how anyone their age could be this excited about a holiday. Hongjoong turned to him with a smile and realized he was being watched. He quickly looked away blushing at being caught. They walked into the store and headed straight for the decorations. Seonghwa, if he wasn’t so annoyed with the man he was working with, would have thought it was kind of adorable that Hongjoong was getting so excited. The way his face lit up when he found decorations he thought were pretty, how he was basically running through the aisles like a little kid. Seonghwa, on the other hand, was not having as much fun. He grimaced as he glanced at the rows and rows of fake snow, lights, snowmen, and Santa figures lining the fluorescent lit aisles. He was definitely not a fan of the season. Everyone was always getting sick and spending money they didn’t have on presents that people would just forget about. There were fights with family and general mayhem and stress that he was comfortable not being a part of, no matter how weird that made him. He rolled his eyes at the sight of a giant inflatable dancing Santa lawn decoration. All this stuff was too cheesy for his taste. He was about to ask Hongjoong what they were looking for when he noticed the shorter man wasn’t in the aisle with him. He glanced behind him but he was alone. He frowned and pushed the shopping cart down the aisle ready to start searching for the Christmas obsessed Hongjoong. He was about to turn the corner when the man himself, pale-faced turned the corner looking like he saw a ghost.</p><p>“We have to leave.” He said. All of the previous joking and excitement had disappeared from his voice. Seonghwa gaped at him.</p><p>“We just got here.” He replied stunned. Hongjoong was so excited to shop, what the hell could have happened?</p><p>“Seonghwa,” Hongjoong began looking him in the eyes, “We have to leave now.” He finished. He had never seen Hongjoong so serious before, the man was always joking and laughing.</p><p>"Okay fine, weirdo.” Seonghwa replied. He turned around and followed Hongjoong back down the aisle towards the front of the store. “Do you mind telling me why we’re leaving when we’ve only just begun?” He asked. Hongjoong sighed.</p><p>“I, uh, saw my e-ex a few aisles d-down and I really, really don’t want to deal with him.” He explained. It looked like he was about to panic and it felt like there was more that Hongjoong was going to say when a man turned the corner blocking their way. Seonghwa noticed Hongjoong freeze beside him. This must be the ex then.</p><p>“Hongjoong?” The man asked, “Wow! It’s been forever since I’ve seen you.” Seonghwa could feel the tension radiating off Hongjoong. It must not have been a great break up by the way Hongjoong looked like he wanted to murder the man and was also on the verge of passing out at the same time. He glanced between the two. It was becoming more and more obvious that Hongjoong wasn’t going to say anything. “I really miss you. Would you be able to get coffee sometime soon?” he asked. Seonghwa was disgusted and annoyed. This guy clearly had no idea how to read a room. Hongjoong was looking worse and worse by the second and Seonghwa had no idea what to do so he cursed himself as he uttered his next sentence.</p><p>“Hi, I’m Seonghwa, it’s nice to meet you. Are you one of Hongjoongie’s friends?” He asked smiling like he does when he wants to make someone as uncomfortable as he can. The man shifted back and forth on the balls of his feet glancing between the two men in front of him, trying to assess the relationship they had.</p><p>“I’m David. Hongjoong and I actually dated for a while.” He said. He was acting so arrogant, like he was the best thing Hongjoong had ever experienced. Seonghwa looked over to Hongjoong again noting that he had barely moved. He was so tense and if Seonghwa didn’t know any better, he almost looked scared. Seonghwa, again, cursed himself internally for what he was about to do but he would want someone to help him in a situation like this. It was with that thought that he said,</p><p>“Babe,” he began, looking at Hongjoong. “You never mentioned anyone named David.” He said, leaning forward and wrapping his arms around the smaller man’s waist. This seemed to shock Hongjoong out of whatever was going through his mind. He clearly got the idea and leaned more into Seonghwa, or maybe he just was in shock and needed the comfort, either way, Seonghwa could see David growing more and more uncomfortable. </p><p>“Yeah he’s an old friend.” He said, emphasizing the word <em>friend</em>. Seonghwa giggled for added effect. He glanced at David who looked shocked.</p><p>“Sorry, could you get out of the way, we have places to be.” Seonghwa said, his bitchiest voice being used. David stepped aside for them to pass and as they were leaving the aisle, David watching them go, Seonghwa slid his hand down from Hongjoong’s waist to his ass. He pushed his hand into Hongjoong’s back pocket and pushed the cart with his other hand. It was only when they left the store that they separated. Seonghwa noticed that Hongjoong had a blush on his still pale face. They glanced at each other and burst out laughing.</p><p>“Thank you for that. You really didn’t have to do it.” Hongjoong said looking up at Seonghwa. He still was a little shaky and nervous.</p><p>“Hongjoong you looked like you were ready to fight him or pass out, I didn’t really have a choice. Anyways, he was being rude, he deserved to be embarrassed a little. It was no problem.” He finished rubbing the back of his neck. Seonghwa realized that this was probably the longest conversation they’ve had where they weren’t fighting with each other. They stood in front of each other awkwardly for a few seconds before making their way to the car.</p><p>“Okay, let’s find a store that doesn’t have any ex’s and get this shopping done.” Hongjoong said laughing. Seonghwa chuckled too. He glanced to the side where Hongjoong was fiddling with the radio to get Christmas music to play, and felt a smile stretch across his face, although he couldn’t place why.</p><p> </p><p>Seonghwa sighed as he looked outside the store window as the cashier scanned all the items they bought (way too many in his opinion). It was already pitch black outside so there was no point in going back to work. He was hoping that he would be able to shop quickly and go back to the office for a few hours but seeing how dejected his coworker looked after the interaction with his ex, he decided that he didn’t have to be a complete mood destroyer and let Hongjoong take his time shopping. Hongjoong pulled out the company credit card, paid and then grabbed as many bags as he could. Seonghwa followed carrying the rest and, notably, the heaviest bags. They made it back to Seonghwa’s car and soon enough were on the road.</p><p>When they reached the office parking garage Seonghwa got out of the car and opened the trunk. They grabbed the bags and silently hauled everything up to their office to store it. There was still a light on in Yunho’s office and Mingi’s reception computer was still on, but his desk was mysteriously empty. Seonghwa glanced curiously at Yunho’s office but decided that he would rather not know if anything was going on. He knew that Yunho had a thing for his assistant but it was none of his business. At least they weren’t locked out. They got their stuff together quietly. It was only when a loud moan could be heard from the direction of their boss’s office that they kicked into high gear and rushed out. As soon as the elevator doors shut, they glanced at each other and burst into laughter. They didn’t stop laughing until they reached the bottom floor of the office building. He looked around the parking garage noting that his and Yunho’s were the only cars. Did Hongjoong not drive? It was getting cold, he felt bad making the other man walk.</p><p>“Do you need a ride home?” Seonghwa asked. Hongjoong looked up startled. He blushed and shook his head.</p><p>“No! I’m fine. Thanks though. I live pretty close.” Hongjoong replied. “I’m also really fond of walking.” He answered as an afterthought. Seonghwa thought that was crazy but he really shouldn’t be surprised by anything Hongjoong says or does at this point. He shrugged.</p><p>“Okay. If you insist.” He said. They both looked at each other for a moment awkwardly.</p><p>“Well, I’ll see you tomorrow?” Hongjoong asked. Seonghwa nodded.</p><p>“Of course. I’m probably going to stay late to make up for today.” Seonghwa replied, rubbing the back of his neck. Hongjoong looked shy. <em>That’s so cute.</em> Hwa thought. He almost fell backwards, startled with the thought. <em>Where the hell did that come from?</em></p><p>“Oh. I was also planning on that. Sorry, I get carried away around all things Christmas. I love this time of year.” He replied. They both shuffled awkwardly.</p><p>“Well, I’m going now. Take care.” Seonghwa said, turning quickly to his car. He looked out his windshield to see Hongjoong walking out of the parking garage and towards the train station. He let out a deep sigh. It wasn’t until he sat in his car again that he realized how tired he was. He let out a big yawn and started the ignition. Today had been an okay day. He hoped that there would be more like this. He found that it was relaxing to not have to fight with the younger man all the time.</p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p>Seonghwa stood in front of the coffee machine watching the liquid drip slowly into the pot. This was his only saving grace today. Their shopping trip yesterday and all the extra planning they’ve been doing has caused his work to pile up a bit so he needed to stay late to tie up some loose ends and hopefully begin reading through a few of his new manuscripts. He finally was able to grab his beloved warm drink, splash some soy milk in it from the fridge and go back to his desk. He had just settled back into his work when a loud booming laugh sounded from right beside his desk. He felt his shoulder tense, shooting straight up to his ears. He could hear the charismatic Hongjoong chatting away into his phone with a client. <em>Why does he have to be so goddamn loud this early in the morning?</em> Seonghwa thought to himself as he straightened his papers. It was going to be another long day.</p><p> </p><p>By the time the day was ending, Seonghwa was proud of the amount of work he had accomplished. He had only made it through half of his things and he still needed to stay late but hard work was one of the things that made him feel the best about himself. He looked up from his manuscript, glanced at his now cold coffee beside him and decided that he was going to take a small break and order some dinner. It was only polite, he thought, to offer Hongjoong some food too and not to mention it was convenient because of the delivery fees. Yes, that’s why he would offer, he reasoned with himself.</p><p>“Hey, I’m ordering some take-out, do you want to split the order? I’m thinking sushi?” He offered. Hongjoong smiled and nodded.</p><p>“Just get me whatever you’re getting and let me know how much I owe you.” He replied looking back at his current manuscript. Seonghwa nodded to himself and smiled. He picked up his cell phone and made his way to the break room. He quickly called and placed the order, and started the coffee machine again. Glancing at the glowing numbers on the microwave, he let out a deep sigh. It wasn’t even 6:00 yet and his energy was already fading. The coffee machine gurgled and beeped signaling his drink was ready. He grabbed his warm cup, pausing to inhale the bitter, slightly sweet aroma, and almost dropped it all on his way out of the breakroom. The reason for this clumsiness being his boss Yunho.</p><p>“Whoa watch out!” He cried, reaching out a hand to steady Seonghwa. He managed to catch himself, not a drop of coffee spilling. He sent a silent thank you to the universe for giving him that one saving grace. “It’s pretty late Hwa, why are you still here?” He asked gently. Seonghwa sighed, his shoulders drooping.</p><p>“I just have a lot to catch up on. It’s okay though, Hongjoong and I ordered some food and we’re both staying late. I’ve already told the cleaning staff not to lock up until later.” He explained. Yunho eyes widened when Seonghwa mentioned Hongjoong. </p><p>“Oh? Joong’s sill here?” He asked. Hwa’s heart thudded. <em>Joong.</em> Joong. Joong Joong Joong Joong Joong Joong. All he could think about was the nickname. “Okay, anyways, just don’t overwork yourself, you can always catch up after the holidays.” He explained. Seonghwa nodded distractedly. Seonghwa shook his head to rid himself of the image of Hongjoong smiling softly while being addressed by his nickname.</p><p>“Don’t worry about me, I’ll be fine.” He says. He pats Yunho on the shoulder and makes his way back to his desk. He carefully sets down his steaming mug and glances at the pile of manuscripts. His eyes feel scratchy so he decides that instead of reading, he’ll start answering some emails. He can hear Hongjoong tapping away at his computer next to him and some soft music playing. He usually would get annoyed and say something but he honestly welcomed the sounds. Seonghwa would have gone crazy sitting alone in the silence. He fought the urge to look over the partition and see what the other man was up to. He knew what he would find anyways. Hongjoong with his shock of blue hair sitting in his office chair in a way that would baffle contortionists, his phone nestled between his shoulder and his ear, and his small fingers tapping away at his keyboard. <em>Joong.</em> Seonghwa sighed and faced his work again. He couldn’t afford to get distracted and what did he care about an irritating man’s nickname anyways. </p><p>It was a few minutes later that Yunho called out a goodbye and the two boys waved him away. An hour passed, their food arrived, they ate in relative silence while working. Another hour passed, Seonghwa kept chipping away at his pile of work. His eyes getting blurrier and blurrier the longer he stared at the bright screen of his computer.</p><p>It was around 8:30 when Seonghwa stood up to stretch and get yet another coffee. He only had a small pile left of things he absolutely wanted to get done that night so he just needed to power through the next little while. As he stood he glanced over at his desk mate and his jaw dropped open. Hongjoong had fallen asleep on top of the manuscript he was currently reading. His lips were slightly parted and his face completely relaxed. Seonghwa didn’t think he had ever seen him look like that before. So peaceful and calm. He shook himself out of it, realizing he was staring and went about his coffee making routine.</p><p>When he returned to his desk, he debated waking up Hongjoong who also had work to do, or letting the man get some rest. He was clearly exhausted, they all were. It was a busy time of year. He ultimately decided that it wasn’t his responsibility and no one would fault Hongjoong for finishing things a little later than normal. Seonghwa had just opened his current project, ready to finish for the evening when his cell phone rang. When he saw the contact name he immediately denied the call. He kept working for a few minutes when the same name flashed again on his screen making the device buzz around his desk. He reluctantly answered the phone and put it on speaker mode with the volume lowered so he could continue working.</p><p>“Hwa? Is that you? Why didn’t you pick up the first time?” A shrill female asked in an annoyed voice.</p><p>“Sorry mom, I was a bit busy. Why did you call?” He asked. “Is everything alright?” He was trying to remain polite. The last time they had a phone call, it didn’t end well so he was hoping for the sake of both of them that he could keep the peace.</p><p>“Of course, everything is alright, not that you would know. You barely call us anymore.” She replied. He glared at the computer screen in front of him. <em>I wonder why?</em> He thought sarcastically to himself.</p><p>“Mother, you know there is a reason I don’t call but I don’t want to get into it again. Why did you call me?” He asked again. He silently stood to check that Hongjoong was still asleep and not bearing witness to this disaster but found the other boy blushing red and staring straight at his computer. Seonghwa sighed. So they were doing this. Hongjoong was going to bear witness to the mess that was his family.  </p><p>“You’re being extremely rude Hwa. Trying to push me off the phone.” She complained. He stayed silent. She huffed. “Fine. I wanted to know if you’re coming home for Christmas this year.” She stated. He groaned internally. Why did he have to be having this conversation right now? He just wanted to finish his work and go home.</p><p>“I wasn’t planning on it mother.” He stated. “You know how I feel and how father feels so I don’t think there’s any need to spend my whole vacation fighting.” He explained matter-of-factly. He continued typing out a project outline that he was working on. There was silence on both ends of the call for an uncomfortable amount of time.</p><p>“You’re still claiming that you’re interested in men?” She asked shortly. His eyes widened and he glanced at the barrier between him and Hongjoong as if he would be able to see his reaction. Seonghwa was slowly losing his cool. He huffed.</p><p>“Yes, mother. I’m still gay.” He snapped. She sighed. “I’m sorry I’m so much of a disappointment to you.” He said, seething.</p><p>“You really are so aggressive. No wonder you can’t get the promotions you want. You’ll be stuck where you are for the rest of your life. Just a lowly editor with nowhere to go and no place to call home.” She stated. “You could have had a high paying job at your father’s company but you chose to abandon us. No one’s sons treat their families like this.”</p><p>“Maybe if you think about how you’ve treated me, you would see why I am the way I am. I am perfectly happy being an editor. In fact, I enjoy it. Not that you ever cared or ever will care about me or my interests beyond if they make you look good to your rich asshole friends.” He retorted. He knew his voice was slowly rising in volume but he couldn’t help it. His parents always made him so mad. He was not in the mood to have this conversation.</p><p>“You know what Seonghwa, you are so ungrateful and you will rot in hell for the choices you make-” he interrupted her by slamming his finger on the end call button. He took a few deep breaths. He hated how riled up his parents made him. He didn’t notice that tears were streaming down his face until he saw the droplets land on his desk. <em>Fuck</em>, he thought, <em>now I’m crying and Hongjoong is going to think I’m a fucking baby.</em> He sniffled and glanced around for a tissue and couldn’t find anything. He felt someone tap his shoulder and turned around to see Hongjoong sheepishly standing behind him. He held out a box of tissues.</p><p>“Thanks.” Seonghwa answered, pulling some out and wiping his face. He took a few deep breaths. He felt Hongjoong’s hand on his shoulder again.</p><p>“I don’t know if this is over stepping or if it’ll even help you but my dad also had the same reaction to me being gay.” He explained, leaning against the partition wall. “I was like 12? 13 maybe? And I think I had known for a while that I was different from other boys. I had no interest in dating or kissing or sex and I was just lost for a long time. Then I was watching a show with my mom one day and there was two men who kissed and they were married with kids and for the first time I saw a life that I could imagine for myself. It took me a while after that to come to terms with being gay but once I did I felt great.” Hongjoong explained a small smile on his face. He was looking down at his shoes and Seonghwa felt himself chasing eye contact with the smaller man, invested in listening to his story. Hongjoong blushed when he realized that Seonghwa was looking at him and continued, “I decided one day, for whatever reason, that I wanted to tell my parents so at dinner after school I just said it. My mom smiled and hugged me and thanked me for telling her but my dad-” He paused. He glanced at Seonghwa and frowned. “It wasn’t good. He was threatening us a lot and tried to hurt me. My mom was furious. She decided that we didn’t need him and the next day I skipped school so her and I could pack all our things and leave.” He finished. He was a little teary eyed but he was smiling. “We never looked back. It’s just been us for so long and we are, sorry were, happy that way.” He finished smiling, a little teary. Seonghwa found himself smiling too.</p><p>“Thanks for telling me that Joong.” He replied, the nickname slipping out unconsciously. Hongjoong glanced away, blushing and Seonghwa slapped himself internally for wanting to call him that again just to see his cheeks dusted red.</p><p>“Thanks for listening, <em>Hwa</em>.” He replied with a small giggle, “I hope it helped to hear that. I know we haven’t always gotten along with each other but I’m here if you want to talk. I know it can be hard when you don’t have someone who understands you.” He answered. Seonghwa smiled. He grabbed Hongjoong’s hand and squeezed it as a thank you. Hongjoong stood up straught and made his way back to his cubicle. “Now, lets get our work done and go the fuck home.” He said energetically. Hwa chuckled and shifted his brain back to work mode. He heard Hongjoong’s music shift to something more energetic and he turned it up louder and Hwa was grateful for the distraction. He got back in the groove of his work, getting all the things he wanted to do crossed off his list. The clock had just flashed 10:00 pm when he stood and stretched for the last time. He leaned over and shut off his computer and began gathering his things to leave. He chanced a glance over at Hongjoong and saw the younger man asleep on a manuscript again. He sighed.</p><p>“Hongjoong.” He called softly, walking into his cubicle to nudge him. “Wake up, I think you should go home and sleep in your bed.” He called out. Hongjoong shifted and then lifted his head blinking blearily up at Seonghwa. He nodded and slowly, silently started gathering his things. If Seonghwa fiddled with random things at his desk pretending he was getting his stuff together so he and Hongjoong could leave at the same time, well, there was no one around to call him out on it. They both finally made their way down to the main floor of their building and Hongjoong was about to walk out when he felt someone grab his wrist. Seonghwa could see the lines of exhaustion in his eyes and the way he was dragging his feet and felt pity for the man walking home all alone this late.</p><p>“Let me drive you home.” He said. Hongjoong looked like he was going to protest but he glanced outside and saw the darkness and thought about his long walk to the train station and then home. He nodded and let Seonghwa pull him back into the elevator. The doors shut and Seonghwa dropped his arm. They entered the parking garage and made their way to the only car left. As they got settled, and the heat was turned on, Hongjoong, even in the midst of exhaustion managed to flick on the radio to the Christmas music channel. Hwa smiled to himself. Hongjoong gave him his address and Seonghwa started driving. It was quite relaxing driving in the warmth of his car with the soft music filtering through his car with someone next to him making it seem so alive. He glanced over at said person and giggled softly when he found him passed out against the passenger window. It was actually really adorable. Hwa couldn’t wipe the smile off his face the rest of the way to Hongjoong’s home. He realized that he was still smiling as he crawled into bed and let his soft pillows and even softer holiday music drift him off to sleep.</p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p>Park Seonghwa was going to kill Kim Hongjoong. Let it be known that he will not escape their office with his life. The younger man in question was looking up at Seonghwa with doe eyes and an apologetic smile as he sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck. </p><p>“I thought I told you to make sure that the staff knew we would be here late.” Seonghwa said with a deep sigh. They had just spent the last 4 hours decorating the office and making it look like a winter wonderland and just as they were about to leave, they found all the doors locked and no one left in the building. </p><p>“I forgot that you asked me and thought that <em>you</em> would do it.” He explained. Seonghwa rolled his eyes and headed back towards the elevator. “Where are you going?” Hongjoong called after him jogging to keep up.</p><p>“Well I’m not going to spend the night sitting by the elevator and I know Yunho is away on that trip so I might as well try and be comfortable.” He stated pressing the button for their floor a little too forcefully. Hongjoong winced. He didn’t blame Seonghwa for being upset, he wanted nothing more than to go home and relax with his Christmas lights on and a movie and now he was going to have to spend the night with a man he was basically in love with. The universe hated him, there was no other explanation. He glanced over at Seonghwa, not for the first time that evening, and who could blame him. The man was tall, lean, and dressed as if he was going to be in a holiday photo-shoot, with a soft looking cream-coloured sweater and jeans. Hongjoong didn’t even want to get started on Hwa’s face. He could write soliloquies about his face. Oh, Hongjoong was so far gone for this man it wasn’t even funny. Seonghwa cleared his throat and glanced up to see him holding the elevator door open. He smiled sheepishly and ran into the elevator. You could cut the tension with a knife. Hongjoong gulped, pulling at the scarf wrapped around his neck. </p><p>“I really am sorry, Hwa.” Hongjoong flinched, the nickname slipping out unconsciously. He heard a sigh from next to him. </p><p>“It’s fine, I just don’t know what we’re going to do tonight.” he mumbled. Hongjoong thought for a moment and then, like his best ideas usually do, a thought streaked through his head. </p><p>“Well since we’re stuck here, let’s have a mini party! We have some food and drinks in the kitchen and we can watch a movie or something!” He said, he was getting excited already, they could find something on Netflix for sure and he always kept peppermint hot chocolate in the office this time of year. He glanced at Hwa to see his reaction to the idea and his grin fell. </p><p>“If we’re stuck here, this is the perfect time to get ahead on some work. Why would we waste it doing something like that?” he explained. Hongjoong shrugged fighting the urge to roll his eyes at the mention of work. The phone call with Hwa’s mother flashed through his head and he remembered that there was probably a reason Hwa worked as much as he did. He could understand a shitty family situation better than most people. </p><p>“I don’t know, it kinda feels like a sleepover right? We can just relax for one night and have fun. I’m not really in a work mood right now.” He tried to reason. Hongjoong turned to him as the elevator dinged and they walked out. He was using his best pouty face to try and get his way. Hwa looked at him and sighed deeply. </p><p>“Fine but I’m not watching anything stupid and you have to make us food.” He replied. Hongjoong grinned from ear to ear. He took off his jacket and threw it on his desk chair and raced to the break room with their mini kitchen set up. He looked at the fridge trying to figure out what to make. He must have been deep in thought because he jumped 4 feet in the air when he heard Hwa clear his throat behind him. He could hear the taller man laughing to himself as he huffed and bent down looking again. He saw cheese and butter and managed to find some decent bread someone had left behind. There was a really old, sketchy portable flat top that someone brought in a while ago, and by a while he meant sometime in the 80’s, so he fired it up and grabbed the dusty pan that went with it. Questionable grilled cheese would have to do. He sent a silent prayer up to whoever was listening that they wouldn’t burn down the building. </p><p>15 minutes later he had two plates of grilled cheese sandwiches, a bowl of popcorn, and two cans of pop. He had to admit he was pretty satisfied with his makeshift meal. He grabbed everything and left the break room trying to locate Seonghwa. The older said he would try to figure out where they could eat and watch a movie. He heard rustling coming from the conference room and headed in that direction. Hongjoong’s stomach swooped in excitement. The lights were off except for the string of christmas bulbs they put in there earlier and the projector had its screen paused on a Netflix movie. The large table was pushed off to the side and two chairs were set up in front of the screen movie theatre style. Hwa was bent over the computer in the corner messing with the speaker so Hongjoong set about placing their food down. </p><p>“I chose the first movie I saw to test it so you can change it if you want. It’s called “The Knight Before Christmas” or something.” He stated. He walked over to the food and grabbed his plate settling himself on one of the chairs. </p><p>“Oh! I like that one! Good choice!” He replied. He pressed play, grabbed his food, and sat in the other chair as the movie began. They both were seemingly enjoying themselves, chatting occasionally about how cheesy the plot was and who they were rooting for. There was a scene with the leading man walking out shirtless and Hongjoong, subconsciously, embarrassingly, and horrifyingly, let out a gasp.</p><p>“He’s so hot.” He exclaimed. He immediately slapped a hand over his mouth, embarrassed. He heard Hwa laughing at him and glared. </p><p>“You’re right, he is.” He said, still chuckling. Hongjoong’s cheeks flared red and he stared resolutely at the screen in front of him. They munched on popcorn, watching the rest of the film. Hongjoong teared up when some of the kids got gifts even though they couldn’t afford them and Hwa laughed at him gently, passing him a napkin to wipe his eyes. As the credits rolled, sealing another cheesy, happy ending, both men stretched and started cleaning their plates. After the dishes were done, they looked towards each other both silently wondering what they would do next. Hongjoong pulled out his phone to check the time and a bright “9:30” flashed at him. Way too early to sleep so they had to fill their time with something. </p><p>“Let’s dance!” Hongjoong said suddenly. Hwa looked at him like he grew a second head. </p><p>“Dance?” He repeated. Hongjoong nodded his head running out of the breakroom to the conference room where they were set up. He pulled up youtube and started playing a playlist of his on shuffle. An upbeat girl group song came on and Hongjoong started doing the choreography as he danced around the room. He has been so stressed lately and frankly he didn’t care what he looked like. He deserved to have fun. He could hear Hwa’s laughter as he leaned in the doorway watching him. He did a little shimmy and motioned with his hand for Hwa to join him. He slowly shuffled over and started doing small bounces but he loosened up and soon they were laughing and dancing all over the room, screaming lyrics to some of their favourite party songs. Then, disaster struck. Well, it wasn’t as dramatic as that but Hongjoong felt like his world was ending as the songs switched and a slow one came on, a guitar strumming softly from the speakers. He blushed looking over at the computer.</p><p>“Sorry, I must have put on the wrong playlist.” He said sheepishly. Hwa smiled at him walking closer. </p><p>“That’s fine, just don’t make this weird.” He said and he grabbed Hongjoong pulling him in close. Hongjoong felt his heart drop to the floor. They were slow dancing. That was a thing that was happening. He could feel Seonghwa’s hands settle on his hips, making his skin feel like it was on fire. Their bodies were pressed so closely, Hongjoong could almost make out Hwa’s heart beating. He felt the taller man’s breath tickle his ear as the older man leaned down, “I can physically feel you overthinking.” He chuckled softly and Hongjoong was glad that Hwa was holding him because his knees almost gave out. Seonghwa reached down, grabbed Joong’s arms and looped them around his neck, settling his palms back on Joong’s hips. They started swaying lightly to the song and as Hongjoong accepted his reality, he loosened up and rested his head on Hwa’s shoulder. </p><p>“This is nice.” He said softly. </p><p>“It is. You have good taste in music.” Seonghwa complimented. Hongjoong blushed.</p><p>“I mean yes, this dancing is nice but also I meant in general, I’m happy we’re not fighting with each other as much.” Hongjoong replied. He felt Hwa pause for a moment before their dance continued. </p><p>“Me too.” he finally answered. Hongjoong felt warmth spread through his body at the words. Maybe being paired together for this party wasn’t so bad after all, he thought to himself as sweet guitar chords flowed around them and christmas lights flickered around the room. </p><p> </p><p>They decided to sleep in the conference room too as it felt more comfy than sleeping out in the open part of the office. They managed to find some yoga mats hidden away in a storage room from some long-forgotten “office fitness” initiative, bundled up coats were used as makeshift pillows, and they found emergency blankets with the first aid kits. All in all, it was a pretty decent set-up. When they we’re almost ready to sleep, Hongjoong popped into the breakroom to make them some hot chocolate. Hwa put on some soft music to play and sat on his respective mat. They both took sips of the cocoa and sighed. </p><p>“That’s so nice.” Hongjoong said, holding the cup close to his body. They hadn’t realized how cold it had gotten. The place must have automatic heating. Seonghwa nodded drinking from his mug too. They glanced at each other over the rims of their cups and glanced away again. They sat in silence for a while. Not an awkward silence but empty. </p><p>“So, you’re going to be home alone for Christmas too?” Joong asked him. Seonghwa looked up from his cup and nodded, quickly glancing back down and the swirling brown drink.</p><p>“Yeah, not in the mood to deal with asshole relatives this year.” He replied. He wasn’t looking forward to being alone but he was not willing to brave his parents for the three relatives that he actually enjoyed talking to. Hongjoong nodded. “What about you?” He asked.</p><p>“Um yeah, I’ve got no one so I’ll probably be alone too.” He shrugged. Hwa could see there was something more there but he wasn’t sure he should press. Hongjoong seemed to contemplate something before sighing. He looked down at his lap, tapping his fingers on his mug. “My mom passed away a few months ago actually.” He explained. Seonghwa’s eyes widened. “She was the one that I used to spend the holidays with so this is kind of my first Christmas alone.” He finished.</p><p>“I’m so sorry. You seemed to be really close with her.” He replied sadly. Hongjoong nodded. </p><p>“I was. We would spend all the holidays together but Christmas was always our favourite.” He chuckled, eyes glazed over, lost in a memory. “We would always spend a whole weekend decorating our place and then both our places when I moved out.”</p><p>“That sounds like a lot of fun.” Hwa replied with a small smile. </p><p>“It was. Every Christmas morning, her first gift to me was always a set of pyjamas that matched hers, and a box of pre-made pancake mix. I know that sounds super lame but it was the <em>best</em> part of each year. I couldn’t have cared less about the other stuff as long as I had my pyjamas and my mom and I could spend the morning making pancakes together.” He finished with a sigh. Seonghwa nodded, sipping from his drink. That did sound nice. Seonghwa couldn’t remember a time he ever had something nice like that with his parents. They were always too busy. </p><p>“Remember that month I was in here only a few days a while back?” Hongjoong asked, “That was when it happened, her death. That’s why I have so much piled up work as you so dutifully mention every day.” he snarked, sticking his tongue out. Seonghwa opened his mouth to say something but Hongjoong silenced him with a hand. “It’s okay, there was no way for you to know what happened unless I told you, I don’t blame you.” He said softly. Hwa still looked like he wanted to apologize but then thought better of it. </p><p>“Anyways, enough sadness, let’s talk presents. Have you done all your shopping yet?” Hongjoong began, changing the subject. So they talked, and drank hot chocolate. And as the soft music continued to play out of the speaker, the two boys’ eyes started drifting closed, their speech slurring with exhaustion. They set their mugs aside and pulled the emergency blankets over themselves. Settling in for the night.</p><p>“Goodnight Hwa.” Hongjoong whispered not wanting to break the almost magical, timeless feeling of the evening they had just experienced. Softly, whispered back, as if saying that everything was going to be okay,</p><p>“Goodnight Joong. Sleep well.” Hwa answered. Hongjoong could feel his smile stretching across his cheeks as he turned around and promptly fell asleep. </p><p> </p><p>Joong woke suddenly and felt shivers wracking his body. He was sure he had never felt this cold in his life. He sat up pulling the emergency blanket around his shoulders and bundling himself into a ball to keep warm. He glanced out the window watching snow furiously tumble around and then over at Seonghwa and saw that he was also shivering but still fast asleep. Hongjoong fumbled beside his little sleeping area to find his phone, which was almost dead and freezing, he groaned. It was only 2 am. How was he going to sleep if he was this cold, his body was shaking so violently he felt like he was dying. He could guess that Hwa wasn’t doing much better and he was genuinely worried that something bad was going to happen to them. He crawled over to the older man and gently shook his shoulder.</p><p>“Hwa wake up.” He called gently. Seonghwa shuffled in his sleep and shivered again. Hongjoong gently tapped his arm again, calling his name until the man finally cracked open his eyes. He looked confused for a second before he fully woke up. His eyes widened and he brought his hands to his face, breath coming out in small puffs to warm them.</p><p>“Holy shit, why is it so cold?” He whispered. Hongjoong shrugged and pulled Hwa’s emergency blanket to cover the taller man’s shoulders. </p><p>“We can’t sleep like this. We’ll literally freeze to death. The heat probably doesn’t kick back in until like 6 or 7.” Hongjoong stated, huddling as much as he could under his blanket. Hwa nodded, still rubbing his hands together. “What do we do?” He asked. Hwa thought for a moment. </p><p>“Why don’t we try to sleep a little closer together and maybe our body heat will help.” He answered. Hongjoong nodded, he would normally be freaking out but he could barely feel his fingers anymore. He pulled his yoga mat closer to where Hwa was sleeping and both men stretched out again covering as much of themselves as they could with the blankets. They were almost shoulder to shoulder and Hongjoong <em>tried</em> to fall asleep but he literally could not stop shaking. He felt Seonghwa shivering as well. They both sighed.</p><p>“This isn’t working, we’re both still freezing.” Hongjoong said. He turned his head to the side finding Hwa already staring at him. He looked like an angel in the soft glow of the christmas lights and Hongjoong’s poor gay heart stuttered in his chest. </p><p>“I think we need to get closer.” Hwa whispered. Hongjoong froze and not because of the cold this time. He watched, still shivering with his teeth clattering, as Seonghwa pulled their blankets off exposing them to the frigid office air. He then felt himself being pulled along with his mat towards the other man. When they were basically on top of each other he dared a glance at Seonghwa who was looking anywhere but at Hongjoong. They both turned on their sides, no one willing to make the move forwards the extra few centimetres. Seonghwa huffed and then Hongjoong felt himself being pulled into a sturdy, lean chest. His head was resting right on top of Hwa’s heartbeat which was thundering loud and fast, probably from the fear that they might actually die, Hongjoong thought. The weight of both blankets was added to them and then toned arms wrapped around his waist, pulling him impossible closer to the most beautiful man Joong had ever known. If he made it out of this night alive he was going to kill Yunho and then resurrect him and give him whatever he wants for making this happen. He finally, <em>finally</em>, started to feel warmth seep back into his limbs. He sighed, content. He felt laughter vibrate Hwa’s chest. </p><p>“Why are you laughing at me?” Joong whispered, mock offended. </p><p>“You’re like a cat or something, purring because you’re happy.” He replied softly, “It’s cute.” He added. Hongjoong felt his soul leave his body. He couldn’t breathe.</p><p>“Go to sleep weirdo or I’ll show you how cat-like I am and scratch you.” He answered. Hwa chuckled again and then fell silent. Hongjoong was so comfortable he thought he would fall asleep right away but he couldn’t stop thinking about how he hadn’t realized how much he needed this until this moment. He missed the feeling of being safe in someone else’s arms. He was sure that Seonghwa was asleep so he wrapped his own arms around the man and snuggled into him more. Then, out of nowhere,</p><p>“Goodnight Hongjoong. Tonight was actually fun. Thank you.” He felt the whisper close to his ear. Hongjoong blushed and was thankful that his face wasn’t visible. </p><p>“Goodnight Hwa. I had fun too.” He replied softly. And to anyone outside the building, they would see a boring grey facade, nothing fancy or interesting. Little did they know that on the 10th floor, in a conference room that was barely used, two people who used to fight and bicker every day, took a step towards each other. A gap was closing, two stars on their way to collision in the most beautiful way one could imagine. That step, that one tiny, infinitesimal closing meant everything. As the two boys fell asleep it was like the moon in the sky and the sun about to rise breathed a sigh of relief.<em> This was the way it was meant to be</em>. They whispered softly as breaths mingled and dreams danced towards a better tomorrow. </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p>Hongjoong groaned as he rustled awake. The first thing he noticed as he woke was how bright it was. He cracked his eyes open and immediately shut them as the light from the room pierced his eyes. The second thing he noticed was how warm he was. He slowly opened his eyes and found himself pressed into a chest. Then it all came back to him. He felt the blush colouring his cheeks. Then he heard whispering and shuffling. He tilted his head as much as he could and found Wooyoung, San, and Yunho standing in the doorway with their phones pointed in his direction. He glared at them and attempted to shift out of Seonghwa’s embrace. To his embarrassment and shock, Hwa pulled him closer and mumbled something that sounded like “Joong, stay”. Hongjoong was sure he looked like a tomato at this point. He gently tapped on Hwa’s shoulder to get him to wake up as the other men relented and left the room. He tapped again as the man shuffled and watched as the other man slowly opened his eyes, coming to awareness about the situation. He glanced down at Hongjoong.</p><p>“Morning.” He said sleepily. Hongjoong felt his soul ascend. There was no universe in which he would have ever thought he would get to hear Hwa’s raspy morning voice. He must have saved a lot of people in his past life to be this lucky. Hongjoong looked up at Seonghwa from his position still semi-pressed against his chest. And that was the moment he died. Or not really, but it sure felt like it. Because Seonghwa was looking back at him with a soft smile and a look in his eyes that Hongjoong couldn’t place. Maybe he was scared to think about what it meant. It felt like they were both holding their breath for something, moving slowly closer to each other. Hongjoong let out a stuttering breath as his face came to a halt inches away from Hwa’s. They looked in each other’s eyes and the world seemed to fall away. Hongjoong felt his heart pounding in his chest. Hwa kept gazing at him with that impossibly soft look. Joong didn’t think he had ever seen Hwa look that soft and kind before. His eyes like melted chocolate, his hair soft and ruffled from sleep, lines across his cheek from his coat-pillow. The invisible pull between them drew them in even closer and Hongjoong’s eyes fluttered closed of their own volition. He felt the older’s breath puffing against his lips, the two of them about to touch-</p><p>A loud banging on the door of the conference room startled them. Hongjoong’s eyes flung open and he gazed at Hwa in front of him, then down at their still cuddled position. They hastily separated as Yunho poked his head in the door. </p><p>“Not to interrupt whatever is going on in here, which you will tell me about eventually, but I want you both to go home and actually sleep in your beds so that you’re not dead tomorrow for the party.” He said, laughing. “Also, the place looks amazing! You both really outdid yourselves!” He finished. He waved and walked out of the room. It wasn’t until he left that Hongjoong realized he was still extremely cold and <em>tired</em>. Sleeping on the floor, freezing cold most of the night isn’t great for getting a good rest, Hongjoong supposed. He stretched his arms and both men started packing up the stuff they had brought in, pointedly ignoring what happened, or almost happened, before Yunho walked in. When they had all their things, they slowly left the room. He could feel the eyes of his co-workers following him and Hwa as they made their way out to the elevators. Hongjoong was going to press the main floor button Hwa swatted his hand away and pressed the button for the garage.</p><p>“I’m obviously going to drive you home, you fool.” He said and Hongjoong could hear the exhaustion in his words. He glanced at Seonghwa and found the older man smiling. Hongjoong smiled too and waited for the elevator to take them to their destination. The ride to their respective homes was silent, both of the men too exhausted to even think, let alone talk. Although Seonghwa exclaimed a quick,</p><p>“I’ll pick you up tomorrow for work, be ready by 8!” Before Hongjoong left the car. Hongjoong didn’t let himself think about what happened in the conference room and it was only when he was safely tucked into his bed with the blinds closed and his eyes already shutting, that he let himself smile and most importantly, hope. A small spark ignited in his chest that he may not be the only one in the duo with unshared feelings. He sighed and let himself fall asleep while images of blonde hair and pink lips floated through his mind. </p><p> </p><p>Seonghwa opened his eyes. He stretched his hands above his head and then reached for his phone. 5:00 pm. Well. His sleep schedule was going to be fucked. He groaned. He slowly sat up. He was reaching for his slippers when he heard a soft knocking from his front door. He was confused. Why would anyone be coming to his place? Maybe someone from work dropping something off? He pulled on some house clothes and walked out of his room through his pristine apartment. He got to the door and peeked through the peephole. He pulled open the door in confusion.</p><p>“Hongjoong?” He asked. The smaller man blushed and shyly rubbed the back of his neck.</p><p>“Um….. I may have locked myself out of my apartment…..” He explained. Seonghwa sighed. </p><p>“And you came here because?” Seonghwa asked. Hongjoong looked down at his shoes. </p><p>“I didn’t know where else to go?” He offered. Seonghwa squinted his eyes at the younger man before stepping back and waving him into the apartment. Hongjoong took off his shoes and walked in taking in the space. He had never technically been here but he had been in the area when Yeosang or their other friends needed to drop something off. Thank god the apartment had a directory outside. Hongjoong allowed himself a moment to take in Seonghwa’s apartment. It was a nice place, had a good view, was spacious, but there was just something that bothered Hongjoong. It was… empty. Bare. No decor on the walls, no photos, no paintings, no plants, just basic furniture that matched the clean white aesthetic of the walls. </p><p>“Are you done judging my place?” Seonghwa asked, amused from the hallway. Hongjoong realized he was just standing admiring the place in the middle of Hwa’s living room. Hongjoong laughed.</p><p>“I wasn’t <em>judging</em>,” he explained. Seonghwa fixed him with a stare that said: we both know that’s bullshit. “You don’t have any decorations though.” Hongjoong stated with a frown. Seonghwa shrugs.</p><p>“I’m not having anyone over here for the holidays, there’s no point.” He explained. Hongjoong looked like he was about to verbally deliver an entire essay on why it doesn’t matter that no one will see it. </p><p>“Do you own decorations?” Hongjoong asked, trying to sound casual. Seonghwa sighed, already regretting letting Hongjoong into his home. </p><p>“Yes, I own decorations Hongjoong, they’re in my storage closet.” He stated. “That doesn’t matter, have you eaten yet? We could order in?” He offered. Hongjoong nodded and they quickly decided what they wanted. Seonghwa went to his fridge where he kept the takeout place’s pamphlet, hanging with a magnet. He called, placing the order. He hung up the phone and realized the apartment was quiet. Way too quiet for a space that Hongjoong was currently occupying. He slowly made his way back to his bare living room and sighed, for probably the thousandth time that night. Glitter, everywhere. Tinsel, ornaments, Hwa’s fake tree, and a litany of other christmas things spread out on his floor. </p><p>“Ummm…. I found the decorations.” Hongjoong said. Seonghwa just stared at him. The audacity to come into someone’s home and start decorating it as if it’s your own. </p><p>“Has it occurred to you that maybe I don’t <em>want</em> to decorate my place?” He asked. He crossed his arms in front of his chest. Hongjoong shrugged. </p><p>“I’ll do all the work and you can just sit and watch me.” He replied with a smirk. Hwa was going to have an aneurysm thinking about the mess he would be cleaning. He rolled his eyes coming to sit beside Hongjoong and start going through the bins of decorations, keeping everything as tidy as possible. As per usual, before they started anything, Hongjoong took out his phone and started playing Christmas music, the notes floating through the air around them. They started decorating, and it was just as messy as Seonghwa predicted it would be. But, and he was loath to admit it, he was having <em>fun</em>. Whether it was Hongjoong beaming at all the ornaments he had, his smile lighting up his face; or Hongjoong wrapping a string of lights around Hwa’s body (“We need to test them, of course!”); or Hongjoong desperately trying to put the star on top of the tree but not quite reaching. Seonghwa could only look on fondly as this tiny man entered his space and took over. He thought he would be upset but when he dug inside himself all he could find was a disgusting amount of fondness blooming in his once cold, empty chest. </p><p>When at last Hongjoong declared they were done, Seonghwa’s apartment looked like a Christmas bomb went off. The food had been delivered ages ago and was sitting in Hwa’s microwave waiting to be eaten, empty boxes littered the living room, fake pine needles from Hwa’s tree were scattered around, lights blinked and glimmered from almost everywhere, and there was an alarming amount of glitter on his carpet and in Hongjoong’s hair. Seonghwa didn’t even remember owning anything with glitter on it. But, he had to admit, for the first time in many years, his apartment actually looked like a home. Not a place where he slept before work, not a place where he had no one but himself, but a real, warm, inviting home. And at the centre of it all, was a bright, smiling Hongjoong, spinning and admiring his work. Seonghwa’s heart gave a painful thump in his chest as he watched the smaller man, but he was far too tired to pay it any mind. That was a problem for future Seonghwa to deal with, for now, he had to clean. And clean, they did. It was around 8 when they were done and Seonghwa stood to heat up the food for them. They settled on Hwa’s small couch, a movie playing in front of them, surrounded once again by the soft glow of Christmas lights. </p><p> </p><p>“When we come back from our holidays, it’s not going to be like before again, right?” Hongjoong asked, looking at Seonghwa as the credits scrolled on the screen. Seonghwa frowned, not expecting the question. Go back to before? The fights, the bickering, the hating each other? Why would they go back to that when this was so much better? Now that Hongjoong was so present in his life, he didn’t think he even <em>could</em> go back to how it was before.</p><p>“No way. You’re stuck with me.” He replied with a small smile and a glance at the other man. This proved to be a disastrous mistake because Hongjoong was positively <em>beaming</em>, a grin lighting up his face. </p><p>“Good because I really like having you as a friend.” He answered back, “It’s much easier than pretending I hate you.” He continued. Then paused, eyes wide as he realized what he said.</p><p>“Hongjoong, what do you mean, ‘pretending’ to hate me?” Seonghwa asked him, feeling like his breath had been knocked out of him. Hongjoong huffed and looked down at his lap. He was sitting cross-legged on the couch and playing with a loose string on his pants. Finally he looked back up at Seonghwa.</p><p>“I mean, you’ve spent the last few years hating my guts and making it very known that you dislike me. I never hated you, quite the opposite actually, but I knew that you didn’t want anything to do with me so the easiest thing to do was go along with it.” He explained, shrugging. His gaze had landed back on Hwa’s couch as if it was the most interesting thing in the world right now. Seonghwa thought that this is what people meant when they said ‘their whole world view shifted’ because it all finally made sense. All the blushing that never made sense to Seonghwa, all the secret smiles when Hongjoong thought he wasn’t looking, every instance added up and Hongjoong could see the moment it clicked and Seonghwa’s eyes widened impossibly more than they had been. Hongjoong’s secret was going to be revealed and there was nothing he could do to stop it. He braced himself. </p><p>“Wait, you <em>like</em> me? After all these years? After the way I’ve treated you? I’ve been sitting here, being an asshole and all you’ve wanted was to be my <em>friend</em>?” Seonghwa asked. Hongjoong froze. Friend. That’s all. Not crush, not boyfriend, not anything other than friend. He didn’t know if he should be relieved that his secret was safe or upset that he had missed yet another chance to just confess and be done with it. Hongjoong looked up at him and slowly nodded. He was prepared for maybe a small apology, a promise to be nicer (they were officially “friends” now, Hongjoong’s mind spat at him unhelpfully), or something along those lines. What he didn’t expect was for Seonghwa to launch his body across the couch and envelop Hongjoong in a bone crushing hug. He was frozen in shock. He didn’t know what to do. Seonghwa was hugging him. His arms were wrapped around Hongjoong’s tiny frame. </p><p>“I’m so sorry Hongjoong. I never meant for this to happen. I never wanted things to get out of hand like this. I was irritated when I first joined the company and saw you doing so well while being so different from me. You were messy, loud, happy, chatty, and so very <em>you</em>, and everyone fell for it. I was angry and bitter and jealous that you could talk to everyone.” He paused and took a shuddering breath and Hongjoong realized that he could feel wet spots landing on the back of his sweater. Seonghwa was crying. Hongjoong made the decision to wrap his arms around him and tried to bring him some comfort as he spilled his feelings out in this small, once bare apartment, in front of his once-enemy-turned-friend. “It took me years, <em>years</em>, to get to that level, to be able to talk to clients, and staff and have that same charm, and you don’t even try. You just exist like that, drawing people in. I was a fool for thinking that didn’t happen to me too. I hated you because of how much I wanted to be part of your circle, I wanted to be the person you shone your light on. I wanted to be your...friend.” He finished. Hongjoong couldn’t think of what to say, or do. He simply sat in Seonghwa’s embrace, rubbing his back, trying to calm the older man down. “I promise, we will never go back to how we were,” he chuckled, “I don’t think I could even if I tried.” He answered. </p><p>“Thank you, Seonghwa. You didn’t have to tell me all that but I’m glad you did. I feel like a detective at the end of the novel when everything clicks into place.” Hongjoong replied with a chuckle, lightening the mood. Seonghwa laughed too and pulled away from Hongjoong, who pretended not to see as the taller man hastily wiped his eyes and sniffled. He settled on the couch again, much closer to Hongjoong this time. </p><p>“Want to watch another movie?” Seonghwa offered. Hongjoong nodded, and so the evening went. They watched two more movies, eating snacks, before both unceremoniously fell asleep on top of each other on the couch, surrounded by old decorations, and tucked securely in an apartment - once an empty, cold place now turned into a warm, safe haven; much like the owner of said apartment’s heart. </p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p>Thankfully, Hongjoong was able to contact his landlord and get into his apartment the next morning. His neck was sore from sleeping slumped on a couch but his heart was full. He raced around his place getting ready for work, and ended up being late. He was dreading entering the building late but stopped himself. The only reason he hated showing up late in the past was because of Seonghwa and his snide, teasing comments. Those days were long behind them so with a jump in his step he stepped out of the elevator into their immaculately decorated office space. He shuffled to his cubicle and took off his jacket, getting himself ready for work when he heard someone clear their throat. He glanced up from where he was rummaging in his bag and found Seonghwa smiling down at him from above their partition wall. He smiled back.</p><p>“Morning.” The taller man greeted. Hongjoong nodded his greeting back, his smile growing wider when he saw the Seonghwa was holding out a drink for him. He gripped it and took a small sniff near the mouth opening. Hot chocolate. Hongjoong’s cheeks dusted pink.</p><p>“You didn’t have to get me a drink.” He said, smiling. </p><p>“Fine, I’ll have it instead.” Hwa replied, teasingly trying to take the cup. Hongjoong hissed pulling it away. </p><p>“You’ll have to pry this from my cold dead hands.” He answered, using his body to shield the precious hot drink. They both laughed and settled back in their desks, unaware of the 6 pairs of eyes watching them. </p><p> </p><p>Hongjoong had always felt that he would be abducted one day, he just knew in his soul that would be the way he would go. He just didn’t expect it to be in broad daylight, at his workplace, with a ton of other people around. What was he supposed to think when he was pulled from his chair and basically frog marched into the elevator. </p><p>“You’re having lunch with us today.” He heard the unmistakable voice of Wooyoung saying. He turned around to look at his friend and was shocked to see San and Yunho also in the small space with them.</p><p>“Yunho too?” Hongjoong asked. The tall man nodded.</p><p>“I had some time off and we felt that we all needed to talk to you.” He answered. Hongjoong eyed them warily but let himself be guided all the way to a casual diner close to their building. </p><p>
  <strong>“Come with us, you’re eating lunch in the breakroom today.” Yeosang said as he popped his head over the wall of their shared partition. Seonghwa glanced up at him. </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>“I have too much work, I’m eating at my desk.” He replied. Focusing back on the computer in front of him.</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>“I told Jongho that I wanted to have lunch with you already. Be my guest and tell him no.” Yeosang replied. Seonghwa paled. He knew that Jongho would never hurt him, however, things were a bit different when Yeosang and his wishes were involved. </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>“Fine, I’ll eat with you guys.” Seonghwa replied. He saved what he was working on and grabbed his small bagged lunch, heading to the breakroom. He sat down with Yeosang, Jongho, and Mingi, a surprise but welcome addition. </strong>
</p><p>“So,” San began, as they settled in with their food, “the office looks great! Planning with Seonghwa going well?” He asked. Hongjoong glanced at him suspiciously. </p><p>“Yeah, everything’s fine. Why?” He asked. San looked to Wooyoung, who glanced at Yunho, who then looked back at San. Hongjoong watched the exchange curiously. Wooyoung not-so-subtly nudged Yunho who almost choked on the fry he was eating. </p><p>“Well, we just noticed, you two seemed….”</p><p>
  <strong>“...kind of close lately.” Yeosang explained. Seonghwa glanced up at the men in front of him, his fork full of salad, halfway to his mouth. </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>Seonghwa dropped his hand back to the table and glanced at the small group. Mingi was looking at his food, trying in vain to look like he didn’t know what was going on. Jongho was staring at Seonghwa in a way that made the older man a little nervous and Yeosang was stuck in an almost wince waiting for Seonghwa to yell at him probably.</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>“Um, we’re friends, I guess.” he explained to the group. They all gaped at him. “What do you guys expect? We spent like 3 weeks planning this party, we just ended up talking through some things.” He finished.</strong>
</p><p>“It’s not like this changes much! I don’t know why it’s such a big deal to everyone.” Hongjoong exclaimed, waving a fry around. </p><p>“It’s not a big deal, it’s just sudden?” </p><p>“Was that a statement or a question, Youngie?” Hongjoong asked. He was starting to feel like this was an intervention. “Why did you all want to have lunch with me? What’s this all about?” He asked.</p><p>“Nothing! Nothing at all, we just want to make sure you know what you’re doing.” Yunho answered.</p><p>
  <strong>“Of course I know what I’m doing Mingi! What kind of question is that? Me and Hongjoong are friends, what’s so complicated about that?” Seonghwa burst out. The three men in front of him all glanced at each other.</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>“We’re just worried that someone might get their feelings hurt.” Jongho explained after a minute. Seonghwa furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>“It’s so obvious that you two-” Jongho scowled, interrupted by Yeosang’s well placed kick to his shins.</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>“Obvious that we what?” Seonghwa asked.</strong>
</p><p>“That you love each other!” Wooyoung exclaimed. San and Yunho’s eyes widened as they all glanced at Hongjoong. He had never blushed so hard. Everyone basically knew of his crush on Seonghwa but it was rarely mentioned beyond light teasing. This was the first time they were confronting him about it. He didn’t like it.</p><p>“I-I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Hongjoong replied. All three men stared at him blankly. “What? I really don’t know what you guys are talking about!” He exclaimed, the blush on his cheeks condemning him further. </p><p>
  <strong>“You smile whenever he’s around.”</strong>
</p><p>“You get all flustered and giggly when you’re around him.”</p><p>
  <strong>“You stare at him when you think no one is looking.”</strong>
</p><p>“You almost passed out when you showed up to work and he had a hot chocolate ready for you.”</p><p>
  <strong>“Today, you brought him a drink! You literally memorized his Starbucks order!”</strong>
</p><p>“We just think…”</p><p>
  <strong>“We just think….”</strong>
</p><p>And at almost the same time, the two men being questioned came to the realization. </p><p>“Oh my god, I love him!” </p><p>
  <strong>“Oh my god, I love him?” </strong>
</p><p>Six friends stared at their respective member of the infamous Park/Kim duo. </p><p>
  <strong>Seonghwa’s heart thudded loudly in his chest.</strong>
</p><p>Hongjoong’s palms sweat.</p><p>
  <strong>“How can I go back there and face him? What do I say? What do I do?” He asked, eyes frantically searching his friends’ faces for answers.</strong>
</p><p>“He can never know, this could ruin our friendship. All the trust we’ve built up over the last few weeks could be ruined.” Hongjoong stated, eyes going wide. </p><p>“We really don’t think it’ll ruin everything. You don’t see the way he looks at you.” San explained. Hongjoong glanced up sharply.</p><p>“What do you mean?” </p><p>“Hongjoong, you’re literally the only one who hasn’t noticed that he literally has heart eyes for you whenever you’re not looking.” Wooyoung butted in.</p><p>“I didn’t want to meddle in this but I’ve felt something like this would happen for years, okay? There’s always been weird tension with you two.” Yunho added. Hongjoong slumped back in his seat, his mind going a hundred miles a minute.</p><p>“So everyone knows?” Hongjoong asked softly. The three men nodded.</p><p>
  <strong>“The only two people who seem oblivious are you two.” Yeosang explained. Seonghwa nodded numbly. It felt like his whole world view was shifting. He had to buy a gift. A plan was forming in his mind slowly. </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>“Tell Yunho that I’m going to be late coming back to work. I need to get something.” Seonghwa stated, packing up his lunch and heading out the door.</strong>
</p><p>The four men quickly finished lunch as Hongjoong came to accept his new reality. He settled on what he had to do. They were walking back into the office building when a frazzled looking Seonghwa stepped out of the elevator and towards the doors. Towards them. Towards Hongjoong. He felt his heart stop in his chest. The men all froze staring at each other. Hongjoong was sure he was blushing the deepest red imaginable. Seonghwa locked eyes with Hongjoong, and that was when he knew that no matter what happened in the future, he would be okay. Because Seonghwa smiled. And it lit up his face like a sunrise in the morning. Like a rainbow after a storm. Then he glanced behind Hongjoong to where Yunho was standing. </p><p>“I’m taking the afternoon off, I promise I’ll make it up next week but this is important.” He explained. Yunho nodded. Seonghwa looked as if he was about to rush off again but he stopped and turned back again to look at Hongjoong, finding the smaller man already looking at him. He smiled again, a grin from ear to ear, then left out the door. Hongjoong basically floated back to his desk. He didn’t remember how much work he got done, who he called, emailed, or talked to. All he could think about was a smile like the first bite of a warm cookie and a face that felt like home.</p><p> </p><p>***</p><p> </p><p>Seonghwa looked at himself in the mirror. People usually dressed up for this party despite it being in the afternoon and only a few hours. Seonghwa was no exception. He was wearing his fancy suit, a nice grey ensemble. He adjusted his hair which was styled away from his face for once. This was as good as it was going to get. He grabbed his car keys and made his way to the party. He settled in his car and the radio flicked on with the engine. Christmas tunes filled the small space and a small smile lit up Seonghwa’s face. He couldn’t believe he used to hate Christmas music, until a small, fiery, passionate editor entered his life. He was going to confess to Hongjoong tonight. He knew that it was the right thing to do. Being friends with Hongjoong was better than he could have ever imagined and yes, he was worried that he could ruin everything but he wanted to be honest. He owed it to Hongjoong, after how he treated him all these years. </p><p>He made it to the office building, sighing as he realized he spent way too much time there. One of his new year’s resolutions was going to be to work less. He made his way up to their offices, smiling when jazzy christmas music and glittering lights greeted him as the elevator doors opened. </p><p>“Whew, looking good Park.” San announced as he came up to him, handing him a cup of eggnog. Seonghwa smiled.</p><p>“Not so bad yourself.” He replied. </p><p>“Sannie! Come dance with me!” Wooyoung yelled, from across the office. </p><p>“Duty calls.” San said with a mini salute. Seonghwa laughed, taking a sip from his surprisingly boozy eggnog. He made his way further into the party, stopping by his desk to set his coat down. He took a glance around the space and had to admit, the party was pretty awesome. They had worked hard to make it look good, and it showed. Fake snow lined all ledges and partitions, lights were strung up all around the office giving ambient lighting, there was a fake Santa with a small set for photos, and a buffet of appetizer food. Soft jazz music was playing from a small group of musicians in the corner and people were dancing near the tree they had set up. It was a work of art. Yeosang and Jongho were talking by the food, Mingi and Yunho were dancing together next to San and Wooyoung, and Hongjoong was standing all by himself leaning against a wall, taking in the party. Seonghwa felt his heart stutter in his chest. He looked <em>good</em>. His hair was styled away from his face, he wore a dark red suit, and his ears were visible and adorned with earrings, and he was slowly making his way to Seonghwa. </p><p>He panicked. He couldn’t do this. He needed something stronger than the half empty cup of eggnog. He swerved started moving away from Hongjoong and towards Yeosang and Jongho who stared at him as he approached.</p><p>“Hey guys, how are you? Enjoying the food? Awesome! See you later.” He said grabbing three pre-poured champagne glasses and moving into the breakroom. It was delightfully silent and empty. Seonghwa downed the first glass in a shot, and quickly followed it with the second. He winced but pushed through the third glass. He leaned against the counter, placing the glasses in the sink. He shook his head -oh- that was a mistake. His vision was a little shaky. He may have overshot it. He doesn’t drink that much. He walked out the door, and back to the refreshments. He grabbed another champagne to drink, passing a concerned looking Yeosang and Jongho. He made his way to the man he was avoiding. Who cares if he embarrassed himself? He deserved a hot boyfriend, and that’s what he was going to get. He registered in his very-not-sober mind that he was definitely going to make a fool of himself, but he found that he didn’t care. He spotted the smaller man talking to San by the tree so he started moving in that direction. </p><p>“Jooooooong!” He called as he approached. Both mens’ widened, as did those of everyone around them. San chuckled and excused himself, as Hongjoong gaped at Seonghwa. “Hongjoong, I have to tell you something.” He managed to slur out. Hongjoong giggled and smiled up at the taller man. </p><p>“What is it, Hwa?” He asked. Seonghwa giggled and drank some of his champagne. When did his glass empty again? He was really feeling it now. He needed more alcohol. “I really think you’ve had enough for tonight, Hwa.” Hongjoong told him gently taking his glass. Did he say that out loud? “Yes, you did.” Hongjoong answered again giggling. </p><p>“Hongjoong, I have to tell you,” He started. He glanced down at the man who swept his heart away this season. “You look really good. Like really good. Like so good. So so so good. I don’t even know how to explain how good you look. It’s like my favourite cookie…. Had sex with that hot guy from that movie we watched… that’s… how good you look. Like a cookie mixed with hot guy.” Hwa said, smiling, satisfied with his description. Hongjoong gaped at him, then promptly burst out laughing. He laughed so hard he snorted and Seonghwa registered in his highly drunk mind, that he was falling deeper and deeper for the man in front of him. </p><p>“Thank you Hwa. You look amazing too.” He replied. Seonghwa grinned. He felt so warm inside. He usually hated the holidays but Hongjoong has changed everything. He thought he should say that to Hongjoong so he did, delighting in the way Hongjoong’s perfect cheeks lit up bright red. “Hwa, do you wanna dance?” He offered his hand, putting his own glass down. Seonghwa’s eyes lit up. So they danced and danced and danced. They danced with each other, with their friends, as a group. After a while, a DJ replaced the jazz players and the office got to let loose and party. It was after they had all finished screaming the lyrics to a christmas pop song remix that Hongjoong pulled Seonghwa away from the crowd. </p><p>“Are you feeling okay?” He asked, still a bit breathless from all the dancing. Seonghwa giggled.</p><p>“Joong, I think I’m drunk.” He managed to slur out. Hongjoong laughed.</p><p>“How much did you have to drink?” He asked, smiling. Seonghwa laughed, loud and bright. He made a show of trying to count on his fingers.</p><p>“Must have been like 70 at least.” He answered smiling.</p><p>“I think you are drunk and I’m never going to let you live this down. This is amazing.” He answered. Seonghwa groaned much to the delight of the small demon in front of him. Yunho walked up to them supporting a very drunk Mingi. </p><p>“I think we’re calling it quits, are you both needing a ride?” He asked. Hongjoong nodded.</p><p>“I don’t think Hwa here is in any condition to drive and I caught a ride with San and Woo who have disappeared.” He explained. Yunho nodded and guided them down to the parking garage, after grabbing their stuff. They made it down the main floor as the cleaning staff started their shifts. They passed a very passionate Yeosang and Jongho who hadn’t quite made it to their car before they attacked each other. Both men waving to them without separating from each other. Yunho turned to Hongjoong.</p><p>“Are those two even dating?” He asked in a whisper. Hongjoong shrugged.</p><p>“I have no idea, and at this point, I’m too afraid to ask.” He answered. At the sound of a drawn out moan both sober men, supporting their drunk companions, hurried to Yunho’s car. Once everyone was locked in, they made their way to Seonghwa’s apartment where Yunho asked if Hongjoong was staying. </p><p>“I better make sure he’s okay. Don’t worry I’ll be fine from here. Thanks! Merry Christmas!” He called as he waved his boss away and slowly guided Seonghwa up to his apartment. He prodded Seonghwa to unlock the door and pushed his way inside. “Let’s get you into bed.” He stated, making Seonghwa pull his shoes off at the front entrance despite his protests. He knew the older man would thank him later. Suddenly Seonghwa paused, forcing Hongjoong to stop too as he was supporting the man. Seonghwa pushed off of him on unsteady feet so he could face Hongjoong. </p><p>“I have to tell you something because you’re so pretty and tonight is perfect and I can’t wait anymore.” He explained, trying not to mash his words together. “I like Christmas.” He blurted, “Wait, no- that’s wrong. Well, I do like Christmas, you made me like Christmas. You made me like it because I like <em>you</em>, Hongjoong.” He finished in a rush. Hongjoong’s eyes widened. </p><p>“I like you too Hwa, you’re a great friend.” He replied, trying to gently guide the tall man to his room. Seonghwa pushed against him again.</p><p>“No, I <em>like </em>like you. Like a crush,” He paused to giggle. He leaned down to whisper, “Hongjoongie, I have a crush on you.” He finished, his voice soft and sweet. Hongjoong was sure that he was blushing all the way down to his toes. </p><p>“I really hope you remember all this tomorrow.” He replied smiling. He managed to wrangle Seonghwa into his bedroom, and out of his clothes (not without Seonghwa trying to do a sexy strip show that Hongjoong promptly shut down, blushing like crazy). Once the older man was safely tucked in and, thankfully, passed out, he settled on the couch. He was tired himself and ready to just relax, watch Christmas movies, and make sure Seonghwa didn’t need anything.  He was about to start a movie when he noticed that there was only one solitary gift under Seonghwa’s tree. Hongjoong got up and went to his coat discarded on a kitchen chair. He reached in his long inside pocket and pulled out the small wrapped gift. He quickly placed it next to the lone present. He then settled on the couch and watched his movie. He had a bit of a marathon before he finally felt sleepy. He fell asleep to the sound of snoring from the other room and a christmas movie he put on the tv. He had never been more content. </p><p> </p><p>Seonghwa groaned as he slowly came to consciousness. He felt like someone had taken a jack hammer to his head. He glanced to his night table to grab his phone and saw advil and water. <em>Hongjoong</em>. He groaned as all the memories washed over him. He was an embarrassment. Then he shot up in bed. It was Christmas. He went to his bathroom and washed up a bit and put on some lounge clothes before making his way to his kitchen for a much needed pot of coffee. He paused in his tracks as he saw Hongjoong, still in his now rumpled clothes from yesterday, sitting on his couch drinking hot chocolate and watching a christmas movie. Hongjoong glanced at him. Seonghwa stared back, every embarrassing word that left his mouth rushing back suddenly. </p><p>Then Hongjoong smiled, and he knew everything would be okay. </p><p>“Merry Christmas Hwa.” </p><p>“Merry Christmas Joong.” Seonghwa replied. Hongjoong got up and walked over to him. They both made their way to the kitchen and Hongjoong leaned against a counter as Seonghwa made himself some coffee. </p><p>“So,” Hongjoong began, “about last night.” He stated. Seonghwa blushed deep scarlet, pointedly facing the coffee machine and the eyes staring at him. </p><p>“Um, I can explain.” He answered turning around now with a full cup of coffee. The brown liquid seemed to calm his nerves a bit as he faced the beautiful man in front of him. “I was drunk.” He stated.</p><p>“Oh, I know.” Hongjoong answered with a smirk. “You couldn’t stop telling me how good I looked. Like so so so so good. Like your favourite cookie had sex with a really hot guy.” Hongjoong said grinning and sipping from his hot chocolate. Seonghwa blushed deeper. </p><p>“I was <em>really</em> drunk?” He offered. Hongjoong laughed. He took pity on the nervous, adorable man reaching out a hand and pulling him to the couch. </p><p>“I got you a present.” He stated grabbing the small wrapped gift. Seonghwa glanced at the package curiously. “You know, you usually open gifts, not stare at them.” Hongjoong teased. Seonghwa rolled his eyes, ripping the paper. He held a case engraved with his name. He glanced up at Hongjoong.</p><p>“Joong, this must have cost you-”</p><p>“I don’t wanna hear any of that just open it.” He said eagerly. Seonghwa sighed but lifted the lid. Inside was a pen, engraved with a quote. <em>There is no greater agony than bearing and untold story inside you. - Maya Angelou.</em> Seonghwa mouthed the words with furrowed brows. “I know that there’s no way for me to know this but I may have found out that you write in your past time and so I thought that I could get you a pen so you can start writing your novel. I’ll even be your editor if you beg me enough.” Hongjoong explained, giggling nervously. Seonghwa could only smile. This small man never stopped surprising him. </p><p>“Thank you. Truly. This is beautiful. No one has ever bought me a gift this thoughtful.” He answered. He carefully placed the pen on his coffee table. </p><p>“You should open your other gift there, Hwa!” Hongjoong suggested. Seonghwa stood up to grab the biggish box and then handed it to Hongjoong. </p><p>“It’s for you. I just didn’t want to lug it all the way to the party.” Hongjoong’s eyes widened as he gripped the box. He ripped the paper off and opened the box. Then he promptly started crying. </p><p>“You didn’t.” Hongjoong said. Seonghwa’s heart stopped thinking he had messed up somehow. Then Hongjoong laughed wetly, and everything was okay again. He watched as the precious, man pulled out a box of pancake mix, placing it on the coffee table. He then reached into the box and pulled out two sets of matching pyjamas. Grinning at them like they were diamonds. </p><p>“I didn’t know if this was over stepping but I know how much your mother meant to you and I don’t know I thought it might be cute? I’m sorry if you don’t like it.” Seonghwa stated nervously rubbing the back of his neck. Hongjoong shook his head, tears streaming down his face. </p><p>“This- this is the most amazing thing you could have given me.” He answered. Seonghwa breathed a sigh of relief. </p><p>“Oh thank God, I was so worried, I didn’t want to offend you or- mmph” He was interrupted by Hongjoong tackling him in a hug. </p><p>“Thank you thank you thank you thank you.” He said over and over, wetting Hwa’s shoulder with his tears. He laughed again and then pulled back, basically sitting in Seonghwa’s lap at this point. “Do you remember everything from last night?” He asked suddenly. Seonghwa nodded, his blush making a comeback. “Good.”</p><p>“Good?” Hwa asked. Hongjoong nodded. He leaned in, close enough that their breath mingled.</p><p>“Is this okay?” He asked. Seonghwa could only manage a shaky yes before Hongjoong leaned in the rest of the way sealing their lips together. Seonghwa wished he could say it was like fireworks or some other overly romantic cliche description but all he could think about was the fact that he had someone to spend Christmas with. He had a <em>reason</em> to decorate his house and spend time there and celebrate this once dreaded holiday. As Hongjoong pulled away and then kissed him again and again and again, running his hands through Seonghwa’s fluffy, sleep-mussed hair, he thought about how so very right this felt. He was in the right place, with the right person, with a cheesy movie playing, and horrifying pyjamas that they would be wearing later, and a group of friends that would tease them mercilessly when they found out. He found that as he pulled Hongjoong closer, and deepened their kiss, he didn’t care. If this was how he got to spend his holidays, he would gladly be picked on for the rest of his life. </p><p>They pulled away from each other, both men’s eyes misty. Both of them with grins so big they could barely kiss. That didn’t stop them from trying though. Multiple times, until their lips were red, and swollen, and they were giggling. </p><p>“Hwa, I need to tell you something.” Hongjoong whispered, trying not to break the spell of the moment. Seonghwa nodded seriously.</p><p>“Of course baby, what is it?” He asked. Hongjoong leaned down to his ear, breath tickling the other man.</p><p>“I have a crush on you too.” Hongjoong pulled away laughing as Seonghwa sighed. “Like I said last night, never letting it go.” He smiled cheekily pulling Seonghwa in for another kiss. And so this is how the rest of the day went; ugly, matching pyjamas; kissing; making pancakes and a mess in the kitchen with lots of kisses; watching Christmas movies; kissing some more; drinking hot chocolate; kissing; going out to look at the Christmas lights around the city; kissing under mistletoe; coming back to Seonghwa’s apartment; changing into their matching PJ’s; kissing; and then falling asleep to the sweet sound of Christmas music. (There was probably, also, more kissing, but that’s between them).</p><p><br/>
“I fucking <em>knew </em>it! Wooyoung come here right now! They’re holding hands! Oh my god they just kissed before starting work I’m going to throw up. Wooyoung I swear to god if you don’t get out here I’m going to shave your head. It’s so gross and domestic. I’m sick! I can’t believe you’re missing this!”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I really hoped you liked this mess!!! if you want you can follow or reach out to me on <a href="https://twitter.com/_moon_bean_">twitter!</a></p></blockquote></div></div>
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